7 Things Old Jim Wishes Young Jim Knew

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Let’s face it: hindsight is 20/20—unless you’re like me and your bifocals fog up during altar calls.

I’ve been in ministry for five decades and counting. That means I’ve had the privilege of doing children’s ministry in my 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, 60s—and now I’m staring down my 70s like, “Wait… didn’t I just graduate from youth group?”

Looking back, I wish I could’ve sat Young Jim down, offered him a Dr Pepper, and shared a few lessons that might’ve saved him some headaches, heartbreaks, and bad hair decisions. So here are seven things I’d love to tell my younger self (and maybe they’ll help you too):

1. Don’t Be the Star of the One-Man Show

Young Jim loved to do it all—stage design, puppet shows, check-in, goldfish cracker distribution… the works. He thought building a team was optional. Spoiler: it’s not.

If you’re the only one carrying the load, you’re not building a ministry—you’re building a meltdown. Ministry isn’t about being the hero. It’s about making heroes out of others. Duplicate yourself. Coach people. Share the mic. And remember: there is no success without successors.

2. Your Thoughts Drive the Train

Back in the day, I had more opinions than Crayola had colors—and about as much wisdom as a soggy fortune cookie.

Eventually, I learned your thoughts direct your steps. If you think small, you’ll stay small. If you think negatively, you’ll act negatively. But if you think like Jesus—Philippians 4:8 style—you’ll live differently. Evaluate your thoughts often, and don’t let your mind run wild. It needs a shepherd too.

3. Ministry Is a Marathon, Not a Sprint

Yes, Young Jim… there were Mondays you wanted to quit. So do most people in ministry. But guess what? Your calling isn’t based on feelings. It’s based on obedience.

Stop looking for instant results and start playing the long game. Trust God with the process. When you serve others’ dreams, you’ll find God fulfilling your own. And for heaven’s sake—don’t give in to fear. It’s always the fast track to burnout.

4. Put Family Second Only to God—Not Third Behind the Church

Young Jim gave up too many nights, weekends, and vacations “for the sake of the ministry.” Older Jim knows better.

Your spouse, your kids, and your grandkids need your presence more than your perfection. Guard your day off like it’s the last scoop of Blue Bell. Date your wife. Laugh with your kids. Turn off the laptop. The church will still be there tomorrow—your kid’s ballgame won’t be.

5. Be Your Pastor’s Biggest Fan

Ministry isn’t the place for lone rangers. Young Jim didn’t always get this, but I’ve learned that representing your leader well is part of representing Jesus well.

That means honoring their vision, echoing their heart, and cheering them on even when they’re not in the room. Loyalty matters. Trust matters. And your pastor doesn’t need another critic—they need a champion.

6. Love People More Than Programs

Old Jim knows the most valuable thing in ministry isn’t your service schedule—it’s the people God’s trusted you with.

Love the parents. Love your volunteers. Love the crusty deacon who still thinks flannelgraph is cutting-edge. People matter. Relationships are the soil discipleship grows in. And yes—sometimes people are messy, but so is grace.

7. Learn the Art of Refreshing

Young Jim pushed through the stress and called it “faithfulness.” Old Jim knows better.

You can’t give what you don’t have. If your tank’s empty, everyone suffers. The Holy Spirit didn’t just come to give you power for ministry—He came to refresh your soul. Pray in the Spirit. Take your Sabbath. Guard your joy. And don’t feel guilty about that nap—it’s biblical.

Would I go back and change anything? Sure. But I’m also thankful for the lessons. Every mistake taught me something. Every season shaped me. And every decade reminded me: ministry is about faithfulness, not flash.

So what about you?
What would future you wish current you knew?

Maybe it’s time to pause, reflect, and course-correct before Old You writes an article about it.

Want more stuff like this plus All my Books, resources, Monthly Live Events, A members Only Podcast & more? Checkout NextGenLeaderLab.com where I’m Still learning, still laughing, and still loving the journey. I hope you’ll join me!

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Planning Well Doesn’t Mean Leading Well

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Back in the day, I had a Franklin Planner, a whiteboard calendar the size of Texas, and a Sharpie collection that could rival Hobby Lobby’s inventory. I planned everything—sermons, series, snacks, puppet practices, you name it. I even planned my planning time.

But one day, I had a lightbulb moment that hit me right between the three-ring binder and the Gantt chart:
Just because I planned well didn’t mean I was leading well.
Shocking, I know. I wanted to argue with myself. “But Jim,” I said, “your spreadsheet color-coding is top-tier!”
And it was.

But I also had volunteers who were confused, parents who felt out of the loop, and a team who could recite my plan but didn’t know how they fit into it.
A Good Plan Without Good Leadership is Just… Paper.

It’s easy to confuse planning with leading. But they’re not the same. Planning is important—absolutely. I believe in systems and structure (have you read STRETCH?). But if all I ever do is plan, I’m just organizing people’s time. Leading is about organizing their hearts.
Let me break it down like this:
Planning tells people what to do.
Leading shows people why it matters.
Planning is the map.
Leadership is the guide who walks it with them.

You Can’t Delegate Vision to a Calendar.
A calendar doesn’t inspire people. A Google Doc doesn’t cast vision. And a checklist can’t coach someone through their burnout. I learned that leading well means connecting, communicating, and caring—not just cranking out more detailed plans.
You ever try to follow GPS directions that are technically accurate but lead you straight into a lake? That’s what it’s like when a leader plans without leading. (Ask me how I know. That poor rental car.)
So What’s the Fix?

If you’re a planner like me, here are a few reminders that’ll help you move from planner-in-chief to leader worth following:
Talk to people more than you type.
Real leadership happens in conversations, not just in content.
Stop managing schedules—start mentoring people.
Invest in who your team is becoming, not just what they’re doing.
Revisit your “why” often.
If you haven’t said the vision out loud in the last week, go ahead and say it again today.

Evaluate more than events.
Ask your team how they’re doing, not just how the service went.
Make space for the Spirit.

Don’t get so married to your plan that you forget the Holy Spirit might want to interrupt it.

You can plan the perfect service, coordinate the cutest crafts, and schedule snack duty to the second—but if you’re not leading with heart, with purpose, and with people in mind, you’re just running a well-organized circus.

And trust me, I’ve been to enough circus-style ministry moments to know… you can have a great plan and still lose your monkeys.
So yes—plan well. But lead even better.
Because at the end of the day, it’s not about how good your plan looks—it’s about how well your people follow the God who called you all to it.

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Why You NEED to Join Jim Wideman’s NextGen Leader Lab

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Ministry Leadership is Tough—But You Don’t Have to Do It Alone!

Let’s be real: leading in kids, youth, or family ministry can feel like juggling flaming dodgeballs while riding a unicycle. (Sound familiar?) You’ve got volunteers to manage, parents to support, kids to engage, and let’s not even talk about planning that next big event!

Enter: Jim Wideman’s NextGen Leader Lab!

This isn’t just another leadership course where you take notes, get overwhelmed, and do nothing with it. This is hands-on, real-world coaching from one of the best in the biz—a guy who’s been in ministry for decades, made the mistakes, learned the lessons, and is now handing you the playbook for success.

Why You’ll Love NextGen Leader Lab

✅ Jim’s Been There, Done That – You get to learn from someone who’s seen everything in ministry and knows what actually works (and what doesn’t).

✅ Practical, No-Fluff Leadership Coaching – This isn’t theory—it’s real strategies that help you lead better right now.

✅ A Community That Gets You – No more feeling like you’re on an island! You’ll be surrounded by other NextGen leaders who totally understand your wins, struggles, and the endless search for enough goldfish crackers.

✅ Laugh While You Learn – Jim’s teaching is packed with wisdom, experience, and plenty of dad jokes—so come ready to grow and have fun!

✅ Take What You Learn & Actually Use It – You’ll walk away with actionable steps to make an immediate impact in your ministry (instead of another notebook full of good ideas that never happen).

Who Is This For?

🚀 Kids Ministry Leaders
🚀 Youth & NextGen Pastors
🚀 Family Ministry Directors
🚀 Anyone Leading the Next Generation (and trying not to lose their mind)

Are You Ready to Level Up?

If you’re tired of figuring things out the hard way, this is your chance to learn from some of the best and lead with
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There’s A Brand New Book Available

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What happens when you coach 12 of the sharpest Kidmin & NextGen leaders for 16 weeks that you’ve ever coached. YOU WRITE A BOOK! And that’s exactly what we did!

EVERYONE DOES BETTER WITH A COACH
Practical Solutions For Kidmin & NextGen Leaders is a brand new book from Jim Wideman Ministries.

Everyone can go farther and faster with someone coaching them than they can on their own. This is true in sports, it’s true in your health, it’s true in business and it’s also true in ministry.

I have always admired coaches. As a student of great teams in sports and ministry, I’ve been saying for years’Show me a successful team and I’ll show you a great coach.” I’ve also noticed truly great coaches have developed the skills to produce a winning team wherever they coach. Also they have learned how to assemble other great coaches around them. That’s exactly what I’ve done in EVERYONE DOES BETTER WITH A COACH- Practical Solutions For Kidmin & NextGen Leaders.

I’ve assembled some of the brightest and best coaches from my “Think Different Coaching Network. We identified some of the most common struggles that today’s Kidmin & NextGen leaders are facing and I asked each one to offer five solutions that you can do now to bring clarity and coaching to turn each challenge into an opportunity to improve. Each coach will also offer you a question to help guide you to taking your first step. Now you can get a team of coaches to help guide you to victory.
EVERYONE, YES EVERYONE DOES BETTER WITH A COACH.
When you order the paperback from me I’ll throw in the digital book free. Order yours today!

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